Pace Press

Issue date: 2/16/05 Section: Arts & Entertainment

Media Credit: Columbia Pictures Will Smith (l) and Kevin James star in Hitch

Will Smith failed to be my hero in this love saga. Being aware of the upcoming lovers' holiday, I tried to set my bias against romantic comedies aside. After all, there are only two types of romantic comedies: bad ones and bearable ones. Perhaps if the director is a genius, I could walk away from one of these flicks actually liking it. Under which category will Hitch be placed? My pick is bearable. It had just enough elements in it to make me not want to throw fresh baked pies at the screen.

First thing, the movie is near two hours in running time. The first thirty minutes of the movie, including Michael Rapaport's cameo, are unneeded. The words of advice that are vigorously repeated throughout the beginning of the movie-"Any man has a chance to sweep any woman off her feet...he just needs the right broom"-could have been easily said once and stuck anywhere. The casting was horrendous, and the chemistry that someone thought would be a good idea just wasn't.

Straying away from fighting aliens and saving the world one cockroach at a time, Smith takes his shot playing Alexander "Hitch" Hitchins. He is well known and notorious among women (who know about him) as the "Date Doctor." His job is to give men the chance that they would have otherwise never had with the woman of their dreams. His success is a result of his technique, which teaches men how to love women, not just how to get them into bed.

Hitch's latest client just happens to be Albert Brennaman (Kevin James). He is a shy and stout accountant who is in love with one of his clients, Allegra Cole (Amber Valletta). His love stems from merely awkward glances and her borrowing his pen. Who could make this man into every woman's dream? Hitch, of course.

It still seems awkward to me how there was more chemistry between Hitch and Brennaman than there was with Hitch and Sara Melas (Eva Mendes). Smith and Mendes are attractive people with some charismatic presence that keeps the audiences attention (Smith more than Mendes). Who thought this match up would be a good idea? I am still wondering if either of them believed themselves. They were handed a script, and they read it. There were no sparks flying anywhere in this film. But I won't blame it on Will... Maybe Jada was on set?

The story gets going perfectly: Al slowly winning over Allegra and Hitch slowly falling for Sara. Those two characters couldn't be more perfect for each other. Each doesn't believe in love, and both are single and cynical. Their jobs take up the majority of their time, but when they meet each other, they fall hard. It turns out that the student has to teach the teacher a little something about love towards the end. Who would have guessed? The rest of the story is Hitch-tory.

I'm aware that I just said Hitch-tory. Corny jokes for corny movies. The reason I have mixed feelings about this film is because there were parts that were rather funny. Most of my laughs were caused by Kevin James and his ever present asthma pump while the other three-fourths of the movie made me cringe. From the sappy soundtrack to the overworked acting, the bad definitely outweighed the good. I'm just glad that Jennifer Lopez didn't have to be a part of my movie experience.

Grade: C-

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