Does 'space' mean an end to a relationship?

Dear Jess:

My girlfriend of three years and I came to Pace together. Recently, we went through a breakup, and she has started seeing another guy even though she still has feelings for me and still considers me her soul mate. I want to spend the rest of my life with this girl and this situation is killing me! Any advice?

Thanks,

Hopelessly Devoted

Dear Hopelessly

Devoted:

It's obvious that you love her, and she likely still loves you if she considers you her soul mate, but right now the best thing for both of you is to give each other some space and time to grow. Figure out what you both are looking for in a relationship and in each other.

Love is a beautiful thing, but when you know in your heart that the relationship is on a rocky road, sometimes you just need to take a step back, and this is probably what she has done. She needs a break, and this might be good for you as well.

After you both have taken some time to think and grow, all you need to do is tell her how you feel. Take her out one night to dinner and tell her that you can't possibly live without her and that you love her and would go to the ends of the world for her. Actually, depending on what type of girl she might be, you might want to go about it another way. You don't want her to think you're a stalker either. Just let her know how you feel in a way that will have the best affect on her based on what you know about who she is.

But, keep in mind, you have to respect that it's totally up to her if she wants to be with you again. She might have taken the step back and realized her feelings are quite different than she thought. And, you can't force someone to love you or to be with you even if you do have her best interests at heart. Perhaps it will make you feel better if you also bear in mind the famous saying: if you love something, let it go and if it's meant to be then it will return to you.

I wish you all the best. However, if things do not work out the way you desire, I must tell you not to believe one of the most controversial, common myths of love. Contrary to popular belief, there isn't just one and only "perfect" love for you. With time, you will meet someone else and form an intimate connection with him or her as well.

Good luck.

Jessica Medina is a senior, majoring in Communications. You all may be wondering what makes her so damn special, why her advice is worth so much. Besides the fact that she enjoys helping others, she has taken courses that have helped her learn how to communicate better. She's studied psychology, interpersonal communication, intercultural communication, and the power of language. More than anything else, Jessica will use her old-soul type of wisdom and actually listen to and try to help you when everyone else is sick of hearing about all of your problems. So, go ahead: Just Ask Jess!

Got questions? I got answers! Email me at Justaskjess17@yahoo.com